Coming from a strong family background, I was used to being around people most of the time. Right up from school to university to church to sports, I was always used to having friends and people around me. I was not at all used to living away from home for long periods of time. But you realize over time that to make a living, you gotta make a sacrifice. For some people, that looks like leaving home at an early stage, and for others its something else. It probably requires them to make a sacrifice in a different way. My plans in life were to pursue soccer as a career, as I was passionate about the game and wanted to play the sport professionally. However, things in life don’t always go according to what and how you plan.
I began my first job almost 6 months after I had graduated from university. It was the job of a flight attendant for a domestic airline in India. The independence of not depending on my parents or anyone else for that matter, felt like I had wings to fly. At the time, I still shared space with my brother and parents, but it felt great to be self-sufficient to stand on my own two feet. However, all of that came at a cost.
My involvement in sports and church started to take a back seat, and I started to be increasingly involved and busy at the workplace, which is normal but since my job was not a regular day job, matching schedules with my buddies, or even doing life with friends became increasingly challenging. Not only that, but dedicating time for the things I loved the most started to be pushed to one corner.
Now I was not rostered for long flights, but flying itself was getting tiring and exhausting. The different schedules, odd sleep patterns, etc. became a part of my lifestyle. It was not all that bad since I was flying regional at that time, but I had no idea that very soon my schedules were going to take a big hit. Soon after I received the opportunity to fly for an airline in the Gulf, I left for the Middle East. I thought my schedules was going to get better, but low and behold, I was wrong.
From the outside, life seemed pretty comfortable and settled. Traveling to new countries for the next two years, visiting new places every week, swimming at white sandy beaches, completing close to 60 countries, it was indeed a fun phase of life I lived. The average roster for the month would start in the Americas and end in Singapore or New Zealand. Trying new cuisines, meeting new people every other day started to become a norm. Not to forget that our transportation and accommodation were covered by the company, It was a life where we got paid to travel. On long and ultra-long flights, we had inflight rest, (basically sleep on board) which was legal rest on board, so as to perform our duties efficiently and remain vigilant on the job.
Our salaries every month were tax-free, and we had no delays in receiving them. 95% of the time, we never stood in queues for immigration or security. And on layovers, our transport was arranged every time by the hotel we stayed at. The only things we covered were our food and internet. Well, everyone would pay for that.
As much as the outside looked perfect and happy, keeping oneself motivated and inspired every day in spite of the perks and the travel was a challenge. Some days felt like a huge climb to have that intrinsic motivation because life after all was not that comfortable as it seemed. We made some amazing friendships over the years doing flights with them, but because of the different schedules everyone had, it was a challenge to meet up.
Now some obviously were happy with their social lives; however, it was a different story for others. It was a life where you couldn’t have the comfort of having someone around you when you needed someone. Feelings and emotions were suppressed at times when they needed vulnerability. Making a lot of friends became easy, but making real friends became a challenge. A lot of people just longed for a connection, a real connection with someone, and soon I realized that it is not about the number of friends you have but about the quality of friends you have who would be available when you need them.
Ive seen and realized one very important learning of life, that is, work is just a small part of life. The work one does doesn’t define them in life. I learned that work is not life but is just a part that makes life beautiful, challenging, yet exciting. There are many things in life apart from the work space. Things that drive you, things that make you happy, things that you are passionate about, things that challenge you apart from work. Not to forget that we are not designed to live in isolation and separation, but we’re designed to have social connections and connect with people. Yes, balancing work and life can be challenging at times, but what you don’t know, you just learn. I’ve learnt, life is about learning at different stages and seasons of life if you allow it.
I’m not sure where I read this, but it quoted as, “If you want to walk fast, walk alone, but if you want to walk far, walk with a group.” I hope we will find a group that will empower us, encourage us, inspire us, and lead us closer to the aims and goals we want to achieve in life. Staying connected with people is the key because it’s not always about you but about how you connect and relate to people.
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